I always wonder what is good in love? I never thought about it before. I always goes for it and look for someone who can be love and being loved back. But unfortunately, I failed to notice that love isn't that fair in any kind of relationship.
So I was wondering why I always to be blame in everything. Like for example, the break up thing. It always my fault when the truth, it was never mine. Some people said that you just have to let your ego down and take the blame instead pointing back at the other partner. Yeah, like every relationship I took the blame and never satisfied actually. It is my fault for not having a strong heart or cold heart.
There was one time I fought back, like argue back to my ex about why am I the only one who is to be blame here when you're always the right one. And guess what? She pointed out to every single thing I had done wrong when we were together. All I do was stand there and be queit and just keep on staring at her in disbelieve looks. What can I say? I am not a fighter when it comes to arguing with someone I care or love.
In the end, I always lose and take the blame. I am tired for never had a steady relationship. Like really never once I had a steady and happy relationship. I even lie to my friends and myself that I am happy with my ex. Why is it so hard to find the right one? All I want is just an honesty, trustworthy and loving. Nothing else but those 3 things.
I am an inside and outside closet. That's my story of my relationship for the past few years. Taking the blame, giving in to them and never fight back. So until next time. See ya!
