New Chapter, New Beginning and New Me

"What the fuck Stacey!? I thought we had a deal back then. What with all of these sudden scandalous you're making?! You know what will happen if the paparazzi found out about these stupid idiotic idea you make? In just one glance your fame will be gone and you will also gives our company a bad name" I yelled at her in most dramatic I ever had in my entire life. I couldn't help but be mad at her. Now I know why the sudden called this morning.

I looked at Stacey with a death glare, but all she give was a looked of innocence face. I took a deep breath and exhale it before calmly sit down at the opposite of her. "Seriously S, I thought we had that talk and you agree to us being just friend. What happen 3 months ago was just a phase between us and beside we both know it won't be nice on people eyes if we're together even bad for your fame and the company too."

"You never once care about those others people, you never once damn care about what might my fans think about us at that time including that damn company!" her respond was immediately make me feel regret and a little bit guilty. I did told her that 3 months ago.

I sigh and lean back on the couch while looking everywhere but her "I know I did said those thing to you but you got to know sometime I don't mean anything. Because I just don't feel like being with anyone or even in a commitment relationship. Come on Stacey be mature and stop doing all of these shit and just focus on your career. And accept that there will be no us today, tomorrow or forever. Please, for your own future too."

Before you wondering what happen between us. Well it's all started with a stupid party that we both ended up in hooking up. It was supposed to be a one night stand but sadly we both kind a like each other, so we both try to take things a little slower and get to know each other.

Unfortunately, after a month and three weeks of being together. We were caught in our act of relationship by non other than my best friend; Jessie Walker. She accidentally walk in on us doing the nasty thing, she scream in shocked and quickly yelled at us for being unprofessional. 

Stacey and I both apologies and gave the explanation to Jessie but she didn't take it too well I tell ya. She was angry and mostly disappointed on us but she more disappointed in me since I was one of the big boss at the company and to have this kind of relationship will only make it bad.

She make us to stop doing these stupid and unprofessional love affair aside and focus to our own work. She even said not to let the other media, paparazzi or any company about us, if not everything will be doomed. She yelled at me and then at Stacey, I almost can see the green creature forming on her. I sat there quietly while Stacey looked like she didn't bother what Jessie was telling at us.

Gosh! If only I knew that it will turn out this way, I would absolutely avoid in this love affair. Three years ago was enough for me to not believe in love or staying faithful to the one. Guess I never learn my lesson that 3 months ago. But I was happy that it didn't open my past, so at least I still kept my own promises to myself then.

"I'm sorry Stacey. I really do. You know we can't be together beside you have brighter future ahead of you if you focus on it and never care about this stupid affair we used to had. Let's start over to being friends if not let's start being manager and client, only talking about works nothing more than that."

She wasn't satisfied at my decision, but slowly her expression tells me she finally give in. She let out a heavy sigh, leaning her back on the couch and closing her eyes. I looked at her and wait for her respond, I don't want to push her to the limit because it will only become worst than it's already been.

Reopening her eyes, looking directly at me and suddenly she puts on her smile, a genuinely smile. I smile back but only a small one. I don't want to hope but I pray for it to happen that she agrees with my choice of words.

"Fine. I will stop being a childish and act like a professional singer and model. I'm sorry. But only if you go on a dinner with me this Saturday, nothing but a simple friendly dinner and we can talk about work or anything. We are friend right?" she said as she grinning at me giving me no choice but to chuckles at her respond.

I nodded in understand before letting out a sigh of relief. I thought it will take me for a week to get this done but sadly it's already did. Now I can focus on my work and let say start all over again to becoming a new me.

"Okay I will, but like you said. A friendly dinner and nothing more than that, beside you better told Ms. Walker about this or she won't believe it will be only a friendly dinner" I told her in my calmly attitude.

Stacey nodded her head and grab the phone on the coffee table before dialing who I assume must be Ms. Walker. I couldn't help but feeling satisfied, all of the tension and stress has faded away as soon she's agree with me.

After dinner with her family, I stay for a bit while to have a conversation with her family. I may be her boss, that doesn't mean I can't be friendly with her family. Her family is very kind and caring, I enjoy talking with them until I didn't even realize how late was it.

"Thanks for having me for dinner Mrs. and Mr. David. Next time, let me repay and take you and your family out for dinner" I thanked them and giving them my best smile.

Mr. David patted my shoulder as soon as Mrs. David walk inside the house leaving me and him alone outside his house. I feel so nervous but surely I didn't let him notice.

"Filzah, I wanted to say that I'm sorry for what my daughter had cause you and your company. I know it's hard for you to control her but I'm happy to hear that you and her found yourself in the real agreement this time."

I was kind a speechless. I nodded my head and give him a weak yet honest smile. "I do anything to protect your family. Your family is my family too Mr. David sir. Please don't thanked me since it's my work to handle your daughter anyway. It's already in the contract."

He smile and surprise me with a hug. I awkwardly return and I step back after breaking the hugs. We both have a same expression to let each other knows that we have their backs. 

"Dad!" Called Stacey from inside the house and that's where my cue to go home.

"I guess I'll see you later then sir. Thank you again for the dinner" I nod my head before turning around and walk towards my car.

Climbing onto my car, letting out a heavy sigh and quickly start the car and drive away from Stacey's house. I hope Jessie would be happy knowing I settle between the scandalous matters. If not, I have no choice but to start search for love again...Hmm...After three years how can I do it? I'm scare of hurting again, scare lf being use again and most of all scare being played...I hope this time it will be my last love,  the one and only love...New Beginning of my own love stories.

New Chapter, New Beginning And New Me

CHAPTER 1 : THE NEW BEGINNING

Missing you wasn't the part of my plan actually. My actual plan was moving on and telling you that I don't care what you thought about me, even I know deep down that would be all lies. It was over a few months ago you left me for no good reason and the reason for the break up thing still lingering in my head. Like a song; it repeats over and over and over again. It won't stop.

As I stand here, in these darkest, lonely and cold room. I could feel the sudden sadness. I sigh loudly and knowing no one to bother to come and see about me anyway. Who cares if I am happy or not? Not even my family would dare to asked about how I'm feeling or I'm endearing with these pain in my heart. It ache and it won't ever stop.

I walk out from the cold darkest yet loneliness room, I glance one more time before closing the door behind me. I guess this is it. This is the new chapter of a new me, a new start and new story of my life. I promise that I won't ever open the damn door to my past. Because if I do, I know I won't be able to move on like how I wanted it.

~Three years later~

"Filz! Hey wait up!" I stop from walking turn around to see Jessie running towards me, she was the first chapter of my new life. She was a bit loud, annoying, but she's a really caring, kind and most of all a true friend.

"Hey, what's up? Is something wrong Jess?" I looked down at her as she was catching her breath from running. She held up her hand to wait for a minute, I nodded in understand while smiling at her. Amused might I add.

She then straighten up her clothes and then glares at me "you could had me dying back there, Filz!" I laughs at her sudden words. Like I would guess she will be annoyed at me, I did hear she was calling me but I intend to ignore her. What? I love teasing these girl.

"You got me there Jess" I held up my hands in surrender while putting my best smirk that I know she couldn't help but to rolled her eyes. But I didn't missed the small smile forming on her face.

"Whatever jerk" she slapped my arm playfully before we both started to walk towards our offices. Let me tell you, after what happen in my past. I move away from my hometown and start a new life here in a new place. You must be wondering where, right? Well to answer your unspoken question, I'm in New York. And start my own life here as a new me.

I met Jessie when I first came here three years ago. She saw me sitting alone at the park, and approached me like we're some kind of a friend. She sat beside me, I thought she was just wanted to sit and enjoy the view of a beautiful morning in New York. But I was wrong. To my surprised, she turns to looked at me and held out her hand while introduce herself.

"Hello there, I'm Jessie Walker but people called me J or Jess. What's your name?" I looked at her by surprised and at first I was about to ignored her hand but then I told myself this could be a new start. So I took her hand and shake "Filzah Lucas, but called me Filz."

I was taken back by her big smile. I smile back but not as big as her smile though that could tear your mouth. I always wonder if these is it. The new start, the new beginning of my life. After the sudden introduction, she talked without stop. And as for me,  I listened her talked, only answers or talked when she asked me a questions. 

That's how I know Jessie Walker. I was surprised to know we work at the same company and same department. She's a lot different when she's in office. She turns her mood into work mood and the expression on her face would be scary if anyone who doesn't know her, like how I known her.

"Hey, you okay?" Jess nudge me. Looking at me with a curious expression she wore for today. I smile at her giving her the silent answer that I'm all good.

She shakes her head "I don't understand you sometime Filz. I mean, about what you think inside of your little head. I wish I could read your minds."

I was surprised to her sudden words. I know she knows about my past. I did told her, well half of the stories because I still have the issued of letting people in my life. "I'm sorry Jess, it just that sometime I am scare. You know what I mean right?"

"I know Filz, I understand. Let's forget what I just said" as she said it. She kissed my cheek and straightly went inside of her office. I sigh knowing Jess, she will never wanted to speak it again unless she was the one who brings it up.

"Rough morning Ms. Filzah?" asked my P.A as she follows me inside my office. I could nodded my head and sit down at my chair. Looking in front of me, so many papers needed to be done and I bet your ass it will be a rough day for me.

"Here's your morning coffee Ms. Filzah" she set the coffee on my desk, giving me time to adjust before starting my day. "Thank you Nat, you always know how to save my day. So any message for me? Meeting? Clients?" I asked her before sipping my favorite coffee.

"Mr. Zack called just before you arrive, he wanted to know if lunch with him still on. And you have a meeting with The Beast around 10 a.m. Also Ms. Stacey called asking about you but she didn't leave any message at all" as soon Natasha giving me all the detail for today, I thanked her and let her get back to her work.

I take out my phone and straight away calling Zack. I told him about the lunch is still on and I'll be seeing him around 1 p.m before ended the called. I pick up a few papers on my desk and straight away I'm doing my job.

As you all can see, I am the CEO in Photojournalism and Entertainment Department. My company provide the best of the best entertainment for our clients. I work my ass to get to this top. I couldn't help but thanked Jess for the help, if it wasn't for her I might be a normal worker.

Jessie actually is the owner of these company but since her dad and me are kind a an old friend. He give me these job and even these position since he saw the talent inside of me when I was still a rookie in these company.

Just about last year, Jessie's dad giving the co-partner position in these company with his daughter. I for once refused since being a CEO is enough already for me. But he insist it anyway even Jessie told me to take the offer, so without another word I agree with their decision. I promised that they won't be disappointed to have me in these company and I will work my damn ass for these company anyway.

A sudden knock stop me from doing my work. I call them to come in, whoever it is better be important if not I will kicked their damn ass for interrupting my work here. Piles of work I tell you,

The door open and to my surprised Jess walks inside my office. I raised my eyebrow in amused. She never once the kind of person who knocks on my door. She always barged inside my office without knocking.

"I'm impress Ms. Walker. I never thought you will be the one to knock on my door. What can I help you Ms. Walker?" seeing the playfulness smirk on my face, Jess rolled her eyes and sit down in front of me. Did I tell you, she even let out a huffed sound.

"Must you always be these kind of cocky Ms. Filz? Because if it's, it doesn't suit you at all" smirk forming on her face, letting me know she won't back down these playful fight we usually have.

I laugh at her and shaking my head in disbelieve. What can I say? I always lose to her anyway. She's good with winning, since I let her win anyway. Don't tell her I told you, she will be pissed knowing I let her win.

"So straight to the point, what's bring you here Ms. Walker? Since you never come in my office unless it is necessary for you to be here. You usually goes by the phone or leave a message to my P.A" I asked her as I lean back on my chair looking at her in a serious face, a work face I tell you.

She nodded her head as she put a yellow file on my desk. I slowly lean forward and took the file before curiously opening to see what it is inside the file. I was shocked to see pictures, not just any pictures but pictures of our latest and newest client.

I looked up to meet with Jessie's eyes. Also to see her reaction. I even looked more surprised to see Jessie face are calm but her eyes tells me differently. "Care to explain what's with the pictures Ms. Filz? I thought we had our agreement about these scandalous rumors about her? You even told me few days ago that you will take care about these, but to my surprise when I found these on my desk as soon as I walk in my office this morning. I thought we talked about these before Ms. Filz!?"

Jessie's words were clam yet strictly venom. I almost died in her death stares. I rubbed my forehead as I put down the file on my desk and lean back. I sigh in to how the hell can I explain about these.

"I did Ms. Walker, I did take care of it. I guess she just forgot about the agreement. I promise you Ms. Walker that I will handle these as soon as possible. I can't just throw her away since she still have another 2 years contract with our company and she still have the rights to sue us if we suddenly fired her."

I know Jess didn't look satisfied with my answers. But she keeps it in professional way. She pick one of the pictures before put it up to show me the inappropriate picture of our newborn star. "Is these looked nice to you Ms. Filz?" I shake my head afraid not trusting my words "then, do something about it! Before the paparazzi get it first! We're lucky that this pictures were taken by one of our employees. I want it to be done by the end of this month if not you will deal with me!" she stood up throw the pictures in my face before storming out from my office.

Shit! I seriously thought it settle but guess these girl doesn't take a no for an answer. Damn! I groan in annoyingly while sighing heavily. I should see it coming but guess I was too distracted to notice it.

I push a button on the intercom "Nat please come in my office now" in just a minute, my P.A walks inside my office. I show her the pictures and her expression were the same as I had when I looked the pictures.

"I thought we had an agreement with her? I guess she didn't like it, the agreement we gave her" I said while groan in frustrated. Natasha nodded her head in agreeing what I said. "I guess I have to go and talked to her on my own. Cancel all my appointment for these week, and please tell Mr. Zack that lunch today would also be postpone."

As soon I said it, Natasha quickly make a called for canceling my appointment and postpone my meeting with them. I put everything inside my bag, even the pictures and quickly walked out from my office. I even told Natasha to inform Ms. Walker I'm taking these week off to take care of my outside business. Straight away Natasha called Ms. Walker as I get inside my elevator.

I told you, a rough day for me. Fuck! I hate my life now. I thought it will be okay but in the end it started to become more complicated. New start, new beginning; these wasn't in my list of change. Oh well, I have to take responsibility anyway. I did chose this newborn star who started to form a bad influenced for the fans. I need to stop her or I might lose my job and worst of all, the company name will become bad.

"Fuck my life!" I shout as I stand outside in front of the main entrance. Everyone looked at me like I've grown two head. I ignore them and quickly get inside my car and drive away to my main point.

My new chapter of my new life has just started.