Flashback

As I remember back to the time when we're together, I felt like the rocks fell down on me. Snapping me to sees the truth of what you meant to me. I was stupid for not doing better to you, I was the one who made you cried and hurt you. I never seen it but my friends made me realize after you found someone new. Lying on my bed, looking at the ceiling and flashing back to the time when we said it is over. "I am sorry, I was wrong" the words that I kept on saying but it would not worth because you are no longer here. Can a day I stop thinking about you? Can I work it out the mistake I made? Will there be another day for making up with you? I wish everything be answered. I kneel down in regrets to see how you being with someone else. Left me hanging on my life to know you are happy. "Bii! Let's go!" I snap from my own thoughts and wipes the tears inside my eyes before closing the memory box of You and I. "Be there in a minute!" I shout back before putting back the box to its place. Glanced back once again at the box before walk away from my room. "Goodbye my past, I will never forget about you. Never will be." End of flashback...

Everything

The word has been spoken The day has come Where we all have to do One thing in our life. You think that each of us know What is like to have a good life When all of us just live and have fun But never think about the real matter. In this world people do forget That they only live for awhile They just borrowing this earth And then give it back when the times come. Let's face it We're not perfect Life never fairs Many lies among us. Everything we do We do it for our own self We're being the selfish person And always think about ourselves. So think twice See the real facts of life Where is the true Thinking wisely and reasonable. Don't disappointed In what you do Because you choose that path Do not blame the others. Everything will never be perfect Like we wish or wanted So face it And be happy for now.

Correct Me!

You can have a day all you want But it surely different from this Make me see the truth Behind those words of yours... There are nothing I can do All I want is the truth and honesty Can you do it? Or you scare to let me know? Come and tell me Don't hide the truth Be strong and face the facts... Correct me I know what I am wrong I need the truth So give it or die for it Correct me When I made a huge mistake But don't correct me When you do not know the real thing So what are you waiting for? Correct me now It is now or never Before things end now...!

Random #14 (What I want!)

Just a day where I can not wait to be the one to tell you how much you meant to me... I am just an ordinary girl with nothing special. I am who I am but I feel unsatisfied with one thing....

I want someone that undertand me more than my friends and family.., I want that person undertand where I come from and accept my family like how they accept me...

Love and me are never friends from the start... It is hard to find the right one even if I already found it still it won't be the one...

Been there and done that. Ask me anything about relationship with girls or boys... All I already know how it feel when I dated them...

Truly I am a girl who obeys to her family rules... I am a girl who doesn't like party, drinking, smoking and tattoo...

I am girl who just want to find someone that accept me as I am not for someone I am not....

P/s: suddenly came up in my mind while I feel so boring and listen to music... Around 23:58 before midnight hehe... Sucks to be me -:) can't sleep early always sleep late maybe around 1 or 2 or maybe 3 a.m... If school night I'll be sleeping around 12 or 1a.m...

Guess my life sucks still teenager but already have many stress... Love it or not gotta be live it while I still alive ;-)

CHANGING! (True Story)

I have a huge secret that I'm scare that one day my family will found out the truth about my secret... It wasn't my intention to be like this... It wasn't part of my plan too...

8 years I kept the secret without their knowing it the truth... I never want them to know for whom I really am... I know they will hate me and shout at me for being a...a lesbian....

I'm just a kid when I had my first crush and it was weird because howI like it... I've been hate since I come out to the school and thank god they didn't tell my parents about my sexuality....

My friends accept me for whom I am and said they will always be my friends... Even half of them disgusted at me but they still talks to me until end of my high school years...

Everyone at school knew me for whom I am... But that didn't change a thing at first... I dated few girls but end up broken heart... Hahaha....

I was unlucky with loves but I never gave up on waiting for the right one... My friends told me to stop being a lesbian and become straight as a ruler... I did tried once but failed when I was 16... Hahaha!

Now I'm already 17... I manage through the year of my last high school... I finally change and thanks to my friends who supported me from behind... I know they didn't show any sign of that they care but I had a feeling they just do... It makes me happy enough to try harder than before...

Here I am taking step by step to the changes... I finally to likes guys but had a slight feelings toward girl but I push it away and be stronger...

Until now my parents doesn't know my secret and I love to keep it that way even it's hard and how they talk about gay/lesbian it still stings inside me... But I never get offense easily because I'm used to hearing how they hate les/gay.... Hahaha!!!

I'm not a homophobic or hypocrite... But I talk truthfully and honesty... Straight to the point is what I am... But I do choose the words carefully incase someone get offended...

Changing is harder than I ever thought it should be... Well I guess it's my punishment for being whom I'm not... This secret forever remain silent without anyone knows especially my family... Let it be like this forever until I'm old and ready enough to tell the truth...

Let the change take over and old me will be forever lock until it's time to come out... Changes are my only mission now! No doubt!

This is how I change from being 'L' for almost 8 years and change into straight! Thanks to everyone helping me out especially my friends Faz, Aud, Cassy, Sher, Mitch, Pres, Onie, Atin, and so many more who stay by my side until now!  Thank You!

I Pray For Your Happiness!

She be the amazing girl I ever seen, I can't help to be happy for her. If there someone who can make her happy, then the person is the lucky one to have her... When the day she get marry, I will stand by her side and support her with whatever happen as long she's smile... The person who gets to marry her is the luckiest one, I wonder if she ever knows that I used to like her but too bad there's no faith in us... I wish you the best of luck, even if you don't need one... Because you'll be the happiest girl I ever seen when you walk down the aisle, on the arm of your father... When you married the person you love and happy...

A Present For You!

1. If you want to tell everyone about the fight between you and your best friend, then why not tell the whole wide world about it instead everyone you know. I bet they won't mind to listen and maybe just maybe they support you when all you do was asking for sympathy since your best friend mad at you. But too bad everyone can be faking it to pity you when the truth they just didn't care. 2. Don't try to tell everyone that I stole your best friend from you, because I never did! It was her decision to make who she wants to be friends with or hang out with; it's your fault for this happen. Blame yourself for being to coward for telling the truth instead putting the blame on somebody that you know who happens to be your lover! 3. If I'm the bad person, what about you? Don't tell me you think yourself perfect after everything happen, oh please be more mature! And besides I still remember it clearly that you also did bad things too! Come on, don't be too chicken just because your bff hangs out with me and my friend and please I never said or like if your bff be friend with you! You know her more than I know her, but what you did was hurtful to her! Let all face it, every friendship must have this kind of fight, without this kind of fight it will never be a perfect friendship! 4. Your lucky I'm okay with what ever damn you said, because I promise myself not to start a fight! But if you make the first move; that means making me angry. I don't take two times to think, I will surely hurt you. I'm a patient and never like people challenge my temper! You. Be. The. of. Me! So try to solve things out properly instead looking for a fight that I swear to god I never like it but if you make me lose my temper then let's just pray for whatever happen after that! 5. Call me blind, call me stupid but that doesn't mean I don't know your secret! You need help, I give you help! But never once I thought you will do this to me, well I never knew you be stupid to do it! Fucking liar, cheater on your own gf behind her back! Congrats on doing it! This isn't a threat but it will be if you asked me for another help about your obssesion with girl! Fucking slut and player dude! You think I scared of you or people, you are damn wrong! If there wasn't any laws that killing is not illegal, I will be the first one to do it! 6. You look like her slave even though she's your friend! Haha! You hurt so many of my feeling, you embarrass me and say hurtful things in front of people I don't know! You think you can get away with it? Fucking hell no! I will haunt you and when I do, I kill you slowly! The way your hurt me, I will make the same things to you! I even make your life living hell and crying for help! No one likes you, I know I do! So better watch your back before going anywhere, because you never know when the times come! PEOPLE HATE YOU JUST LIKE THEY HATE ME! BUT IF THEY HATE ME MORE BECAUSE YOUR FUCKING STORY! I WON'T SIT DOWN AND RELAX WHEN MYSELF BEING HATE BECAUSE SOMETHING I DIDN'T DO! I WILL NEVER DOUBT ABOUT MAKING YOUR LIFE LIVING HELL! I NEVER JUDGE PEOPLE, I ONLY OBSERVED THEM! (12:10 P.M) (07/05/2013-08/05/2013) (TUESDAY-WEDNESDAY) {>.<} {*_*} {+.+} {=,=} {8-|} EMOTICONS!!!

Baby It's Never Too Late!

Baby I know it hurts Baby I know your in pain I try to help But everything seem useless I did want to make the pain go I did try to do so But baby it's hard I'm not a fucking doctor You cry at night You cry in your sleep It hurts me to see you like this Baby I'm sorry I tried Baby please stop Don't hurt yourself It's killing me I know it hurts baby Tomorrow I promise We go somewhere you live We fly to wherever you want As long as I see your smile Even whatever happen Or whatever situation you in We will be together Because it's never too late It's never too late To make things better Because we in this together I promise you on my life So please put on your smile Let the world see That you're doing better Even for just awhile It's Never too late to make things better... Baby it will never too late... Will never be too late because you have me with you baby...

Best Friends!

Best friends are always will be by your side whenever you needed them the most. Even without you says anything, they will always be there for you no matter what happen. When they're too busy, they still be there for you or hear your problems. Best friends are where you confess your feeling, secrets and problems that you have been through. Sometimes they will complained, but the complained will leads you to realisation about honesty and caring. They want what the best for you, so dont take it to your heart. They also can be annoyed with their words, the way they say will hurt you with or without notice. But that just them , best friends can be frustrated too. So just let it go, because without them; you dont have someone to joke with or share some secrets. Even with thier stupid and crazy style, accept them for whom they are. Don't ever judge them if you already know them too well instead some stranger. TRUSTWORTHY, HONESTY, CARING, PROTECTIVE, BELIEVING, FAITHFUL, LOVING AND HELPFUL... Best Friends should have it in them,even though there are more...